Whether you’ve been camping a hundred times before, or never before in your life, you might ask: “Glamping? What’s the difference? Why not just go regular camping?” Well, these are great questions. So read below, because the difference is more than just grammatical…

For a start, we put up the tent for you! Imagine the bliss of no having to faff around with poles, ropes and air mattresses - you can go straight in and relax onto your comfortable double bed. And it’s not just a bit of flimsy polyester straining to blow away at the first sign of a stiff breeze either. We have eight bell tents and four yurts from BCT Outdoors - makers of high quality canvas glamping structures that are both elegant and robust. And they’re spacious too, with easily enough room for a family and even space inside to stand up in. So wave goodbye to cricked necks, spooning your backpack and rude awakenings from your partner’s unfeasibly sharp elbows due to a spacious king-sized bed frame and an actual mattress. Like, a proper one! Feather-down duvets and pillows; crisp, white, freshly laundered linen sheets; extra blankets and even hot water bottles.

The beauty of glamping is that all you need to pack in an overnight bag, because we have all of the essential items here for you already. Seriously! We have actual garden furniture at the tents, proper Weber barbeques and fire pits, and even logs and charcoal provided for you. We have a kitchen in our barn with all the utensils you need, and provide a check-in hamper full of camping plates and mugs, cutlery, matches and firelighters, and even a kilner jar full of marshmallows for you and your kids to roast together. We have fridges and even a freezer for you to store food, ice and ice creams, and cool boxes for you to fish your beers out of in comfort. Our barn even has wifi (just don’t tell the kids), as well as power to charge your devices; a lounge area with sofas, books and games, and a hot water urn for endless cups of tea and coffee. There’s even an indoor fire pit and big oil drum barbecues to use in case of a rainy day. On which note - we even have a giant double-hat tipi with loads of space to hang out in! Some guests have even brought a screen and projector to turn it into a late-night cinema. You barely need to pack a thing to stay here; much less bother with carrying it anywhere. We have a small fleet of wheelbarrows waiting for you, so just chuck your rucksack in and wheel it across the meadow.

On the subject of hassle, one of the biggest things to worry about in camping is the food. If you come to Home Farm, you won’t even have to shop on the way, unless you would prefer to self-cater. Just spend 10 minutes on the internet and Ocado will deliver a banquet straight to the barn. Even Deliveroo knows where to find us, and there’s nothing more pleasingly decadent and subversive than having Dominoes delivered straight to your tent.

To end on a note that is sensitive but mightily important: Where does the modern glamper go to, um, ‘answer the call of nature’? Do you have to awkwardly tiptoe through the forest, armed with loo roll . Or, arguably much, much worse, will there be - hold my hand, we’ll say it together - “Portaloos”? Shudder! Well, unclench my hand because no, absolutely not! Not a portaloo in sight anywhere. Not ever. In fact we’ve built a proper bathroom for you, complete with power showers, running hot water, gleaming porcelain thrones, crisp white hand towels, and sustainably-sourced loo roll. We even provide hand soaps and shower gels from eco-friendly suppliers. In this department, as everywhere, your comfort and convenience is at the forefront of our minds, always.

So really why, after all that you’ve read, why would you ever bother going camping again? Save yourself the hassle, and the discomfort, and the endless self-deception that you’re actually having a great time. Book into Home Farm Glamping, and do the whole camping thing, but actually enjoy it this time around!